The phrase “building relationships by getting uncomfortable” sounds like an oxymoron. By nature, we seek to stay in our comfort zones. However, it is often needed to embrace conflict and leave our comfort zone to strengthen intimacy in relationships. Rob gives an example of a small gesture toward his daughter. The effect it had on their relationship later on surprised him.
Building Relationships By Getting Uncomfortable – Get Out Of Your Comfort Zone To Grow Intimacy
Building relationships by getting uncomfortable is one of the toughest lessons Rob has learned over the years. Developing personal connections does not come natural to him. He admits in this video that he often prefers to be alone, avoids conflict, and is not always comfortable opening up to others. When it comes to strengthening a family, though, that just will not fly.
Years ago, he realized that a wall had developed between him and his daughter. They were not actively fighting, but rather, they were very similar personalities and were not comfortable with expressing their feelings. He could not come up with the words to tell her in person to set things right.
Rob came up with an idea. Each morning, he would post sticky notes on her car window that she would see when she left for work or school. Every day meant a new, short note to encourage her and let her know she was loved. Years went by, and she never mentioned them to either of her parents.
One day, his wife Claudia brought up the sticky notes. It turns out that Rob’s daughter had kept every one of the notes, sticking them to her car’s visor. She had asked Claudia for suggestions on how she could best archive them as a keepsake, since they were so special to her.
Even before this revelation, Rob had noticed that his communication with his daughter had improved drastically. Today, they even have a small side hustle venture together. All of that came together because Rob committed to getting uncomfortable, in order to build their relationship.
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